There's a monster in the closet!

So I've been procrastinating... But after I finish clipping my nails I'm gonna face the monster known as... THE SCALE!


And the number is...

FAT!

or scientifically put;  121 lbs

I mean I am on my period and I've heard many women gain weight or its just hard to get it off... Ill weight in next monday with better results.

I have a busy day planned so all shall be good.

9-1 school
1-5:30 work
bank
drive to boyfriends to pay him back for gas :P
tanning (maybe)
depending on weather, sit on the balcony with a magazine and diet pepsi
that'll fill up my day :)

<3 Halley, Keepin' busy

Floating

Good evening!

I've successfully fasted for the first time in god know how long. I forgot how much I love the feeling.

It's the most freeing feeling ever. A mixture of joy, pride, and a slight dizziness creates an awesome body high. I feel as if I'm floating...

Today wasn't hard but then again the first day never is for me but the second is a real test... the third can go either way but after that I can turn my nose up at any temptation. 

I did a little research on fasting and heres what I found;

The first 1-3 days will be the hardest and you will feel constantly hungry, irritable, and have side effects like head aches and tiredness.

After the 3rd day, hunger disappears, energy levels rise and the skin clears. :)

In the first few days of fasting, over 2 lbs can be expected to be lost per day. After the body gets used to fasting, about 1 lb will be lost per day.

Anyway, I'll weigh in tomorrow because I forgot to this morning... For some reason we weight less in the morning. Just a helpful hint. :)

<3 Halley

The Truth

Hey ya'll.
So I've been eating...
And I've been eating all day everyday...
And I'm fat
I'ts like I don't even care anymore...
But I do care.

I care when I stand in front of the mirror
I care when I step on the scale
I care when I see skinny stick girls
I care when I read all your blogs
I care when I've finished 3 brownies and I'm reaching for the last one

I'm afraid to step on the scale
I'm afraid I have an eating disorder (over eating)
I'm afraid I will be fat forever
I'm afraid I'll never reach my goals
I'm afraid I will always hate myself
I'm afraid of never being good enough for him or for you or for me...

I need something to get me i the zone again!!!

HELP!!!

<3Halley

The Secret To Stop Eating...

I've figured out the formula to not being hungry...
Heart Break.
Everything else fucking sucks but at least I can't eat even if I try.
Awesome


Anyway, obviously a lot has happened since my last blog.
I haven't been on any kind of diet but I haven't been eating the entire kitchen either, which i good I guess.
I haven't weighed myself either...Not good.
Got a boyfriend, lost a boyfriend.
Smoked a lot a pot.
Went to a few partys...
Wait this is how last Summer started out.
That means it must be right around the corner...
Woooo!!!
But I'm fat...
Ewww!
Too fat for the things a wanna wear.


Now go break up with your boyfriends and get skinny!
Ha! No just kidding please don't do that.
<3 Halley

60!!!

I'm thinking if I should fast today or not.
I want to... and I should.
I officially have 5 weeks to loose 17 lbs.
When I'm standing in line at the grocery stores, I brows over the covers of magazines and they usually have weight loss articles that go something along the lines of:
"Lose weight fast!"
"Drop 10 lbs in 5 weeks!"
"How I lost 20 pounds in under 2 months!"
I've skimmed through a few of them.... you just have to buy expensive meals and exercise...
I hate exercise!
I don't mind hiking around here. I love it actually but the weather wants to get nice enough... It's been raining her for like 3 weeks straight.
Michigan is retarted. Yesterday in the morning it was snowing then in the afternoon me and my friend walk to the park.
Anyway, I've think I've made up my mind.
Today is a good day to fast.

<3 Halley

I smell toast...

Over 300 views! Hooray!

Anyway... I've been very good. Kinda.

Yesterday I had half of a medium size "birthday cake remix" from coldstone creamery.
And coffee
Today I've had coffee...
and water

And I delicious new man friend ^_^ he makes me so freakin nervous! I can't even think about food around him... Gonna keep him around.
And this morning I took him to breakfast and only ordered coffee.
 I'm a good cookie :)


Hold up. I'm gonna dry my hair and weight myself.
Helpful hint to ponder while I do this...Sugar causes belly fat. :(


Ok. So...


117.5 lbs
It looks like..
It's so hard to read from 5 feet away lol
I need a digital one.


But thats -2.5 lbs


Not bad...
<3 Halley

I'm doing it!

If you thought that title was suggestive.... you're dirty. Lol

GFA today! (Good Fucking Attitude)
Anyway today I'm fasting it's 6:40 pm and I've have 0 calories! 0 food! Just diet pepsi and Monster absolute zero.

Not even hungry! Gonna do it again tomorrow and friday!
Got a date on friday!
I'll be too nervous to eat in front of him.
I'll probably never be comfortable eating in front of him... he's super cute!

Idk what to say... I've started tanning :)
Helloooo summer... maybe. It's April and like 35 degrees WTF?!

Yeah that's all for now 
<3 Halley

6 weeks

Every blog is now going to start with me apologizing for not blogging in days, weeks, years....

Fortunately this time it's only been a few days..I think.
Anyway, there are so many awesome apps on my iPhone for weight loss, bmi calculation, calorie trackers, work out creators, and all that good crap. :)

They get me motivated. My favorite app is "My fitness pal". Compleatly customisable! I can't spell and my spell check doesn't wanna cooperate. So yeah, my profile is customized so that I don't eat over 400 calories. You just put in the name and brand of whatever you eat and at the end of the day you hit the "complete this entry" button and it'll tell you how much youd weight after 5 weeks if every day were similar to that one. Very helpful.

You can also do it on the website. 
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/
If anyone wants to follow me, my name on there is love2starve.
It's really helpful :)

Anyway, sorry I'm not trying to sell that app for them xD considering it's free!
So, I'm always awful on the weekends, I ate so much. Well not really but it always feels like it these days. So starting tomorrow I have 6 weeks to lose 20lbs. It's stressful as hell. This week I'm gonna try to eat the samething everyday. It's a total of 175 calories everyday. 
Breakfast: Small coffee with skim milk (15)
Lunch: Special K granola bar (90)
Dinner: Soup on the go chicken noodle (70)

Also I'm gonna try to go on an hour long run/hike monday wednesday and friday. If I do that for 5 weeks (lol) my fitness pal says I'll weigh 99.7 lbs! :)

It's great cause I have 6 weeks not 5! Haha ugh! Good mood!

Hoping alls well :)
<3 Halley

Bad Blogger! Bad!

Hey there!
Remember me?
Sorry it's been about 6 years since I've posted. Lol. I've just been... horrible. And busy, and excited about the weather getting warmer. And dreading it... Warm weather means I gotta drop this 20 lbs fast!!!

It's stressful cause my 100 pound dead line is approaching very quickly! May 14th... my birthday. I need some serious encouragement and ass kicking!

So basically I have to loose 20 lbs in 42 days if I counted right... AHHHHH!

I can do it! That's like -1 pound every 2 days.... ok :)

A little thinspo to end the day? Sounds good!

Gotta love cassie from Skins!!


Anyway so today... I spent what was left of my pay check on a giant burger from red robin w fries and a drink from taco bell so im broke and fat till monday. Thats one good thing about being broke... you cant buy food :). Good weather tomorrow! Gonna go for a hike :)


<3 Halley (best wishes on al your goals)