I say that s a complement ;D
Last night I was thinking about my next fast, trying to plan it out, and it dawned on me! I realized that every time I plan out my fast I'm putting a TON of pressure on myself. I've never done good under pressure. Always end up cracking (obviously).
So I've decided that I'm not gonna have an end date... just go until... I don't know. Maybe until I can't get my fat ass out of bed or until I can't get out of a situation that involves eating with other people? Something like that maybe. But no strict plans! But I'm gonna start tomorrow... I could start today cause I haven't eaten yet but I like to start on mondays... I don't know why. The weekend is just a weird starting time. I'm a bit ocd I know... but I think most of us with ED's are right?
I hate labeling myself. I mean I say I have an ED but then I look at myself and say... you're too fat. The only ED you have is over eating you fat pig! It's true... it gets pretty bad.
Like yesterday....I'll just do a list
Late lunch:
Olga's cup of peasant soup and bread
Dinner:
Ramen noodles w/ green beans
King size almond chocolate bar (my weakness right now)
Late night snacking:
Grapes
1/2 apple
pancake
egg on toast
I think thats everything...
Ugh I was feeling hungry and my tummy was all like rawrr blah blah feeed mee... then I typed all that shit out and me and my tummy remembered.
I have a lot to do today. Dishes, laundry, and whatever else my step dad can't do because he works... so do me and my mom but we still do this shit.
Anyway, maybe I'll eat today maybe I won't. All depends on how busy I keep myself
I love my 48 readers <3
Skinny thoughts all day :)
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