Oxymoron?

Too day is a bad good day.
Meaning that I woke up feeling like crap and felt pretty crappy throughout the entire day (including now). But that was ok because no one pushed me to do things I don't wanna day and it was an overall easy day at school and work.

Got my first check! Only $113 but thats ok considering I only worked about 18 hours last week. I can't wait till the store opens up then I'll get about 7 hours a day and saturdays if I want.


So I decided that since I felt so crappy I'd follow whatever today's ABC calorie intake would be. It's 400. And as I said earlier, for breakfast I had lightly buttered cinnamon toast (100) for lunch I had a small banana (84) and for dinner I might have a soup-to-go (70). So I'd be under my calorie goal for today!

There's fun sized candy bars on my desk. I don't want them. There was cake and donuts at work. I looked, smelled, didn't eat a bite didn't even taste it.

I'm getting stronger, every time I weight myself and it's lower than the last time it makes me want to eat less so I can weight even less the next time I weight. Am I weird? Should I eat if I loose weight? What's the point then.

So I think I'm gonna cheat on the weekends when I hang with friends... or maybe not.

this can get very frustrating >.<

<3 Halley